Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Oh Sher - Where is ya?



Dear Sher:

Me and a couple of the boyz waz worried bout you. tooks this pitchur so's youz coud see we waz worrid. I ain't in the pitchur.

TSG



Dearest TSG - Official Stalker of Sher,

Easy there baby. Don't go getting all kinds of worried over me. I'm all good. I've been hanging out doing the three things I do best: drinking, eating frosting, and getting married.

Please note were it not for #1, I wouldn't be nearly as successful at #3. Number 2 is just 'cause I like it like that.

I realize I should be writing. This I know. However, things have been decidedly unfunny in my life lately. Not to worry. It's not like anything particularly wicked is going on. I just am not all a giggle. I think it's the lack of clowns in my daily diet.

My motto has always been when life hands you lemons, eat a clown cause they taste funny. Well actually my motto has always been marry 'em first, ask questions later.

But then again you already know that about me.

I'll be back soon. No worries Honey. Not for nothing, but could you put in a word for me with the guy in that picture with the sweet sleeves? I'm diggin' on his hair and his come hither look. I would so go hither for him.

xoxoxo

Here's a Blip for you TSG 'cause I know you love me anyway.




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7 comments:

Flutterby said...

I personally just think TSG is losing his touch as a stalker. I mean seriously... what kind of decent stalker can't find his stalk-ee???

TSG said...

Sher,
Just a couple guys I met at the farm (Arkansas Prison Farm).
I'll put in a word for you with Roy. I showed him your picture and he thinks you're hot.
He even drooled a little. I'd stay away from Harold, he's out on early release, mostly because he was molesting the livestock at the farm.
Don't get too excited Roy drools a lot for no reason at all come to think of it.

Would it be OK to go over and stalk Flutterby in your absence?

Glad you're OK.

TSG

Sher said...

Flutter - I concur. It is of great concern to me that he didn't know where I was.

TSG - No Darling. You do not have my permission to stalk another woman. You may however drop by and say a brief hello but only if you declare yourself first as mine. Not my rules. (Actually they are my rules.)

TSG said...

Sher,
OK, no stalking other women.

Toad Suck Daze are 5/1-5/3 this year.
I've been waiting to meet you (under the giant toad statue) just like you said. I've been there every festival for the last five years. I know last year you almost made it, but you had to rearange your sock drawer at the last minute, and had to cancel.
I didn't mind I only waited nine hours. (each day)
Maybe you can make it this year.
TSG

Sher said...

TSG,

Honey I will so be there this year. You go back and wait for me under our special toad. How will I know it's you when I arrive? I'm assuming there will be gifts. Maybe that's how I'll know as you'll be the only guy under the giant toad holding an ass load of presents.

Tidewaterbound said...

Glad to see you are still around...you know I keep checking. Hope giggles come your way soon!

Smythe Livingston said...

Sher,
When are you going to interview me again? I have more stories to tell about the Humor Columnist and the straight Jacket.
Smythe