To satisfy at least one of those urges, I'll just do this instead.
Dear Sher,
It's me! Please open up!
Dear Person who gets the OCD Chick award for weirdest subject line ever,
No.
Dear Sher,
Happy Birthday, Baby. You're funny, funny, funny and pretty, pretty, pretty.
Dear Birthday wisher,
I'll let the Baby go this time 'cause you said I'm pretty. But, I much prefer Sweetheart. Don't you read this blog at all?
Dear Sher,
I want to make an honest woman out of you. I think it about time that we formalize our relationship of mutual admiration with an exchange of links. Of course if you're already in a relationship, I understand.
Dear Guy who is funnier than me so I hate him,
I've never wanted anything more in my life than to exchange links with someone like you. Please be aware that this ain't my first time at the rodeo though, so I demand we practice safe linking. I have no idea who else you've linked to after all.
(Readers, visit www.ominouscomma.com right now, but then you turn around and come right back here. Don't be sucked in by his fancy words and use of correct punctuation.)
Dear Sher,
As designated virtual stalker, I wanted to get you a nice virtual gift on your birthday.
Do you think it is a little ostentatious?
I hope your Husband hasn't already gotten you one of these. Enjoy! .........TSG
Dear Official WTCOMF stalker,
Don't kid yourself, Darlin'. Using the word "ostentatious" in an email to me is birthday present enough. (Guess what, kids? Toad Suck Guy has a blog now. Go there and demand he blog about his adoration of me frequently.)
Dear Sher,
Hey, I love your blog. I wanted to tell you that Deputy Pretty guy sounds interesting. I wish I had one of those. Where can a girl get her own?
Dear Chick trying to steal my pretty Deputy,
Ummm, sorry. He's a one of a kind, first edition and trust me when I tell you there are no copies. But if boys with badges pop your pistol, maybe you should consider dressing up and breaking the law. I find it grabs their attention.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I know you guys have likely seen this viral video, but sweet lord... if you haven't you will pee your pants. Watch it now.
Copyright © 2004-2007, Sherri Bailey
This blog may not be reproduced in whole or in part without the express written permission of the author.
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7 comments:
That was one of the funniest videos I have seen in a long while!
Could be Mid-life crisis, I think I experienced it myself a few years ago.
Wanted a tattoo, Thought about getting married (never tried that before), wanted to buy a motorcycle, and ride off with my honey. Thankfully I wised up and just bought a Harley. Get the black leather outfit, forget the skull tramp-stamp, or just get a temp. Mean is good, but just occasionally. Wanna, go bust up the Toad Suck Pool Hall?
Just take it out on Tad, already! The rest of us had nothing to do with it ... unless it really is a mid-life crisis, in which case EVERYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD is guilty. I know.
jaesoreal,
I'm saying!
TSG,
Never been married??? I didn't think those existed any more. A man with a Harley no less... and yet still not married. (I've married men b/c they drove a nice Chevette.) Don't worry. I'll find you your first wife. All the others after that will be up to you.
And yes, let's go bust up a pool hall.
jami,
As my friends know that Tad is my name for any man who dresses well, has great hair and is all kinds of hot, I will happily take it out on him. Where is he?
But ... Tad's gay!
Nice car! What did you have to promise TSG to get that? I can fix you up with a nice bumper sticker that reads 'Warning I'm out of estrogen & I have a Gun".
jami,
Possibly. However, I will attempt to use my hetero feminine wiles to woo him over to our team.
AA,
I didn't have to promise him anything. I refer you back to the statement I made to jami regarding my hetero powers.
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